Holy Regret vs. Destructive Sorrow
Below the Surface- Holy Regret vs. Destructive Sorrow.
March 11, 2018
Illustration: “Say 5 nice things about your sister.” Rolling of the eyes, and offer no satisfaction to my mother or sister, yet my mother was right. We want to hold onto our position of being right and not crediting correction.
A possible breakthrough. 2 Corinthians 7:2-9
- Acknowledging the accusation of abuse of authority. (2)
- An intentional wronging of someone.
- Corrupting the character of someone.
- Exploiting a weaker person. 2 Cor. 11:20
- His motive of calling it out was not to blame them but benefit them. (3a)
- He has not manipulated or exploited anyone as he has been quite direct. (4a)
- His heart for them was that he would “take a bullet for them.” (3b) He also finds encouragement and joy in their progress. (4b)
- Paul acknowledges the external conflicts and inner fear of ministry among people. (5)
- Paul finds hope and comfort in Titus’ report of the Corinthians. (6-7)
- Titus encouraged Paul, because the Corinthians encouraged Titus.
- They acknowledged to Titus their true feelings for Paul, which gives great encouragement to Paul.
- Paul has hope for the relationship as there is good fruit from difficult confrontation. (8-9)
In Summary of verses 2-9:
“I love you so much I am blunt with you.”
“You encouraged Titus, who encouraged me.”
“You actually do care about me.”
“The truth spoken in love took time, but it worked!”
“Wounds from a friend, caused a good kind of sorrow.”
Holy regret verses destructive sorrow. 2 Corinthians 7:10-12
- Relationally good outcomes happen when there is Godly sorrow or regret. (10a)
- Godly sorrow/regret is when the error is identified it leads to holy regret which leads to a repentance—a "change of mind” which leads to a different path. (10a)
- That different path leads to salvation or a rescuing of a relationship. (10b)
- Ultimately, you quit living under the failure and you move forward—no harm! (9c)
- Example of Peter: Matthew 26:31-35, 69-75; John 21:15-19—He goes on to live with great passion and power to his final breath as a martyr.
- Worldly sorrow leads to death and causes you to stop living. (10c)
- Worldly sorrow constantly invites the shame of the mistake.
- Worldly sorrow is constantly on the lookout to blame in order to remove the guilt.
- Worldly sorrow becomes like a cancer to your soul which destroys you from the inside out.
- Example of Judas: Matthew 26:20-25, 47-50; 27:1—He commits suicide due to overwhelming regret and guilt.
- How much do you really love someone if you withhold lifesaving advice?
- Can you deal with potential rejection and offer truth with a spirit of grace and continued hope in love?
- When corrected, choose the path of holy regret (repentance) that enables you to truly live.
- Reject worldly sorrow that chooses self-pity, shame, guilt, or even blames others which ultimately pays forward your brokenness.
2 Corinthians is a letter between Paul and a church that had a fractured relationship. He addresses many relational and deep personal issues that get below the surface and deal with heart of the matter. This book is such a good model on navigating challenging personal and relational issues!